About this Product
After months of being out of stock we are excited to announce that the Kinda Blue Bidet is Back! The Kinda Blue Holey Hiker Backpacking Bidet is made specifically for left-handed people. You have struggled with school desks, can openers, scissors, zippers, and guitars. The struggle with bidets ends here and now with the Kinda Blue Holey Hiker Backpacking Bidet. As left-handed backpackers we know that having to use a right-handed bidet has probably left you more prone to anxiety attacks before pooping which can lead to "DC." That little talked about backcountry problem, Debilitating Constipation. That is why we have made the Left-Handed Holey Hiker Bidet in Kinda Blue. The short wavelength light rays bouncing off the bidet lowers your heart rate, reduces your blood pressure and brings a sense of calm and peacefulness to your bowel movement. It has more of an impact if taken out of your backpack and held in your hand 5-10 minutes prior to pooping or peeing. Please note, it does not have the same impact while pooping in the dark.
Let's just pause and think about pooping in the dark for a second. I have had numerous suggestions (no joke) for changes to the bidet that would make it easier to poop in the dark. I am no longer open to those types of suggestions. If you are pooping in the dark without a headlamp or flashlight, just use the force to know which way to aim. Or...wait for it...there is an award-winning arrow on the top of the bidet. Just feel which way the arrow is pointed, when you grip the bottle point it at your thumb, and you can safely poop in the dark!
EDIT 5/5/2022 We are excited to report that right handed testers have also reported the same great effects!
Here is what one tester had to say:
"As one of the bidet testers, I can wholeheartedly say that Paul at Holey Hiker has really figured out the details on this one. I was already a bidet user before this and thought I had found the best product for backpacking, but the Holey Hiker bidet is half the weight and works better than what I was using before. It fits snugly in my water bottle with no leaks and no worries it will come out if the bottle falls over. It does a great cleaning job while using a minimum of water. I converted to using a bidet at home because they work so well. Now, when I am stuck having to use toilet paper, it feels barbaric. I secretly smirk at all the people who are worried about toilet paper shortages. Best of all I don't have to worry about what to do with used toilet paper on the trail and never have to worry I will run out. Thank you Paul for designing what I consider the best backpacking bidet out there!"
Here comes the product description that is repeated on every page. But this one has a really, really good quote at the bottom from a tester! After reading that skip up to the first line and read the first line because that will tell you what the bidet is made from.
Please note that the bidet does not come with a painted arrow. A Sharpie will last multiple trips, but your favorite nail polish will last a long, long time. The Kinda Blue Little Squirt weighs 7g or .24 oz. Price includes shipping and handling.
International customers please click here for ordering instructions!
If you have any questions please email Paul at firstname.lastname@example.org
If you would like to pay with Crypto please click here
Meet the Maker
Hello and welcome to Holey Hiker Bidets! I'm Paul Bogush the designer, creator, lead tester, and CEO (Chief Elimination Officer) of Holey Hiker Backpacking Bidets. After using a few other bidets I realized that not one had all the features I was looking for. None had the right combination of durability, ease of use, low water usage, and the perfect stream. I decided to start designing and testing my own in December 2020. Each time I went out I made a small change and then came home and fired up the 3D printer to make the improvements based on my experience and the experiences and feedback from testers all around the country. After one last outing on the Appalachian Trail in June of 2020, I had what I thought was the perfect backpacking bidet...but a tester had it eventually crack after long term testing. After another year of prototyping and experimenting with different plastics the final prototype was finally made in July of 2021 and sales to our waiting list and anyone who happen to stumble upon the website began. Our "grand opening" finally occurred on November 19, 2021.
We are the only seller of the Holey Hiker Backpacking Bidet. All other sites are selling imitations! Holey Hiker Bidets are designed and manufactured in a little corner of my house in Connecticut, USA.
And finally, if I haven't convinced you that a bidet is life changing, then listen to Evan!
"Just get one and thank me later. Honestly, I am amazed I have not heard more about bidets for backpacking. I used Paul's bidet for just over 3 weeks while on the Colorado trail and I have to tell you my butt has never been happier. In the past I have had monkey butt issues but using this little bidet and a little bit of washing with some Dr Bronner's, I did not have any butt chaffing issues at all. It's small light and has officially replaced wet wipes in my pack. I also cut my toilet paper usage to about 2 squares per day using this bidet. Paul has been working to perfect his product and I think he nailed it. This bidet is going to be in my pack forever, provided I don't lose it. (Seriously it's small). Once you hop on the bidet train there is no going back and you're going to say to yourself, 'I should have bought one of these sooner.' Trust me."
How it’s Made
Holey Hiker Backpacking Bidets are lovingly designed and 3D printed in the USA in a tiny little room in my house. The Holey Hiker Ultralight Backpacking Bidet is made from "ABS-like resin" which can take more pounding than an average backpacker would ever dish out. Click here to see one of our many strength tests for "the Squirt". The O-rings are FDA grade seals. These are more commonly called “food grade seals” which resist the build-up of bacteria. I tried those...they will quickly degrade and crack :) Each bidet weighs approximately 7g. Because they are made from resin, you cannot leave them in sunlight for prolonged periods of time. So you can't hang it from your rear view mirror, store it outside on your deck, or hang it outside your backpack on your year long thru hike :) That said, after leaving some out for 5 straight sunny days this summer we did not notice any additional weakness in our "rock meets bidet" testing. Please keep in mind that these are not pressed by the 1000's in a factory. I make them at my house which means each bidet is unique and might have a small quirk, a small indent, a little spot where I sanded down a rough spot, which does not take away from the beauty of the four hole spray.
If your bidet malfunctions or gets destroyed by a bear, we will give you a full refund or a new bidet. If you just have bad aim that's on you! We package the bidets the weekend after receiving the order and get them in the mail the following Monday unless otherwise stated on the product pages. You will be sent a confirmation email with the shipping # after it is packed.
Please keep in mind that you will receive no cutesy note or extra packing material to cut down on waste. You will get just a bidet in a little box :)
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE be patient with shipping. We can ship a bidet to California in 3 days one week, and then ship one the following week that will take 14 days. Around holiday times all bets are off :) Sometimes when the USPS takes our packages and scan them in immediately and other times the first scan is at your regional PO. If you do not receive a bidet within 3 weeks of ordering please contact us and we will ship out a new one. Ignore the 3-5 day shipping time that is stated in the automated email with your shipping #. That is just a very loose USPS goal. The current average is 3-5 days but there are so many exceptions. Some bidets will take 2 weeks or more. Approximately 1-2% of all packages are lost by the USPS. That is out of our control and sending a new one after four weeks is the best we can do!