About this Product
? "Birthdays Are Good for You" Card
Because sometimes, the truth really is that stupid.
This birthday card delivers hard facts with a wink and a side-eye. Perfect for your friend who’s getting older but still clinging to their stats like they’re on the Forbes list. Great for science nerds, sarcasm lovers, and anyone who’s suspiciously good at mental gymnastics.
Front Text: Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
Inside: Blank — let your own dry wit or sincere mush fill the void.
? Why You’ll Love It
Printed on ultra-premium, 120# thick cardstock that puts drugstore cards to shame
Standard A2 folded size (4.25" x 5.5")
Comes with matching envelope (zero glitter, maximum sass)
Card protected in a compostable sleeve
Ships flat in a rigid eco-mailer because your jokes deserve safe delivery
